I have been currently really into Them Crooked Vultures. It’s in my car and along with the new Black Rebel Motorcycle Club album and I just can’t stop listening to it. I recently introduced the album to a friend of mine who has been a bit out of the music scene since becoming a dad. I told him the line-up he asked me if it was “some new rock supergroup.” The first thought that came to mind was a picture of the Damn Yankees.

Well, does Them Crooked Vultures qualify as another supergroup? No, not at all. For some reason the label of supergroup really leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth. When I think supergroup, I think Velvet Revolver. It’s a pretty simple formula: shitty, pop rock ballads, skinny, ex-junkie musicians sobering up enough to convince other washed up, currently “between project,” ex-awesome musicians that their “addiction demons” are behind them and they are, “ready to rock.”. Throw them in a boiling rock cauldron and you’ve got yourself a “supergroup.” The thing about these so-called supergroups is, they suck. Starting a supergroup is never a good idea. It’s a result of egos not letting the body and person move into something outside of the limelight. Become a producer, direct music videos, stay in music but don’t, A. Join a supergroup or B.“TRY A SOLO PROJECT.” (See also: Sting. That’s just another can of worms for a future rant)

What’s even worse than supergroups are the pseudo-supergroups. Think Audioslave. This is a bizarre existence. For the cynical music fan like me, this is like a bad acid trip. Imagine going to a show where Rage Against the Machine comes out with Chris Cornell. Whoa, it’s like the ’90s vomited on stage! In theory, this is awesome, but in reality, it sucks. The band no longer rocks out like Rage used to and Chris Cornell’s vocals are out of place. This is a square peg going into a round hole – it does not fit. The whole show is spent thinking about how if they did one thing or another more like Rage or Soundgarden it would be perfect. But they’re not, so it falls flat and fails.

This should have been a one night thing. Like a live band karaoke where Rage was the guest band and Chris Cornell happened to be at the same bar so he decided to get up and sing a few songs. (Preferably “Sister Christian” or ANY Black Flag, Ramones or ABBA song) Instead, they put out albums and toured. So you got to see Soundgarden live, cool. You once caught Rage Against the Machine on tour, nice. You purchased an Audioslave cd and/or saw them perform, you’re an idiot.

It’s time to stand up and say “enough with the Supergroups!” *

*Acceptable, sort-of Supergroups: Me First and the Gimme Gimmies and Probot.