Along with great new members, this Man B Que brought out some really stellar recipes. Last month was like a burger cook-off, this time Ms. Piggy seemed to be the food of choice. July’s host, Ken aka Gululi, partnered up with August host, Magoo aka Magoober, to make a most delicious, kick you in the balls with spice, pork loin. They claim they only used some spice and chipotle peppers in the rub, but one piece of this and your sinuses were instantly cleared, eyes watering and you immediately knew that your butthole was going to be a burning volcano the next morning. On the opposite side of that delicious, hell-pain, were the 3 other great pork selections. Chris, aka Chairs, whipped up a smoked mesquite loin that was subtle but very moist and tasty. I, aka The Godfather, created a new recipe that popped in my head last minute; sweet cinnamon/cayenne pork chops stuffed with smoked gouda and apples. My personal favorite piggy of the night was brouth to us by Adam, aka Mooseknuckle. His tasty chimichurri chops were juicy and perfectly seasoned.

AJ, aka Meat Coffin, made his jalapeno popper, “juicy Lucy” burgers. Stuffed with cheddar and fresh, fully seeded jalapeno, these things were painfully delicious. The other two burger offerings were a lot safer but equally as great. Rick, aka Ricky Thumbs, made a stuffed gouda burger that was oozing with flavor and Dave, aka Mega Grill, made the fanciest burger ever to be devoured at a Man B Que; the Rolls Royce burger. This burger made your taste buds feel poor and beg for change under a viaduct. It was made with 50% duck and 50% sirloin; it had rosemary, basil, goat cheese and sherry. Mega Grill was un-officially renamed Thurston Howell III

John, aka JB Mays, made some awesome, tangy/spicy wings that were gone too fast. Joe, aka Cornfed, made some awesomely seasoned prawns that made Louisiana crawfish jealous. Along with supplying the Man B Que with Half Acre Daisy Cutter, Jamie, aka Dirty Sanchez, took few lucky MBQ members for a cruise in his 1964, 2 door Chevelle Nomad that was hiding a massive Corvette engine under the hood. All in all, this was a most excellent Man B Que and I’m very much looking forward to next month’s. Ricky Thumbs and Tom Grilling will be the hosting on Sept. 30th at their Logan Square Rock and Roll Cave. (Email info@manbque.com for the address)

-The Godfather

The bone-in pork chop is an underrated piece of meat. While steak and chicken get all the love, there are worlds of possibility with the other white meat. I snagged this recipe from a friend’s cookbook, and discovered that not only is it a great dish, it makes amazing leftovers. Take my word for it, you’ll want to fill a pint glass with the glaze.

The Setup

2 thick, bone-in pork chops
1 shallot, minced
1/4 c maple syrup
2 1/2 tbsp cider vinegar
1 tsp crushed black peppercorns
1 tbsp thyme leaves
Kosher salt
Olive oil

- The bone-in the pork chop is far less prone to drying out if you make a mistake than the boneless variety – makes the whole process more idiot proof. Get the thickest one you can find. If not quite the size of a Leon Uris book, then at least an inch thick.

- Yes, getting fresh thyme leaves off the sprig is a huge pain in the ass. But if you can stand it, it’s worth it. If you’re going to go dried instead, then knock down the measurement to 1 tsp.

- It’s more expensive, but get real maple syrup, not the Mrs. Butterworth. You’ll know it’s real because it says “real maple syrup” on the bottle, along with a grade. The good matron Butterworth is curiously non-specific about her pedigree. Get the real stuff – it’s a completely different taste.

- The whole “other white meat” thing was nice, but don’t cook your pork to a uniform chicken-like white. You can have a little pink in there – it won’t kill you, and it preserves the moisture and flavor. Just make sure to bring the pork to 145 degrees.

Cooking

1. Preheat the oven to 350 and salt the chops with a coarse-grained salt.

2. Take a large ovenproof skillet and heat with a tablespoon or so of the oil over medium-high. Sear the chops for five minutes on each side.

3. Flip the chops again and throw the skillet into the oven. Roast for 2-4 minutes, until it’s cooked through to 145, then take them out and rest them under foil while you make the sauce.

4. Put the skillet back on the range over medium-high with the shallot, thyme, and salt. Cook for about two minutes, until the shallot is soft and starting to brown.

5. Pour in the cider vinegar and use a wooden spoon to scrape the fond (tranlation: stuck pork bits) from the bottom of the pan. Reduce the heat and simmer for 2 minutes.

6. Add the maple syrup and peppercorns and simmer for another 8 minutes. When the sauce is done, you’re good to go.

For years, I hated Italian food – especially pasta. It wasn’t until a few years ago that I realized the reason that I didn’t like pasta was because I’d only had crappy pasta. Now I’m so into Italian food that I’ll gladly spend half a day making something as authentic as possible. That being said, striking a line between something truly rustic Italian and something you have the time to make on a weeknight can be a challenge. I think this one straddles the line nicely, even if you do take my recommendation to make your own sauce.

The Setup

1 lb Italian sausage, casings removed
1 bulb fennel, chopped
1 Spanish onion, chopped
1/2 c white wine
2 c basic tomato sauce (recipe below – or just use the jarred marinara)
Olive oil
Salt and pepper

- Hopefully, you got the whole fennel bulb, with the stems and the leaves and everything. Before you chop it up, you’re going to want to take off the leaves and chop them up fine to use as the garnish. It smells great, and makes you look as if you expended more effort than you did.

- So if you want to make your own tomato sauce like some fancy-pants Italian grandmother, take 1/4 c of extra-virgin olive oil (abbreviate it EVOO and I’ll punch your neck), one small yellow onion chopped fine, 5 minced cloves of garlic, a tablespoon of dried thyme, half a grated carrot, and a couple of big cans of San Marzano tomatoes. Crush the tomatoes with your hand in a big bowl, keeping the juice. Cook off the onion, garlic, and carrot, the add the tomatoes and juice (hope your hands were clean), bring it to a boil, and let it simmer for a good while. This makes a lot more than the 2 cups you’ll need. Portion it out in ziploc bags and freeze the rest. Homemade pasta sauce without any new effort. Hell yes.

- Don’t forget the pasta to serve it with. I didn’t list it because you can use whatever you want, and that’s going to affect the cooking time. I used mostaccoli, but the spiral pasta is probably the best match for the ragu’s thick texture.

Cooking

1. Heat a skillet and the oil over medium-high and saute the chopped fennel until it’s soft and beings to brown slightly.

2. Add the sausage and break it up while it cooks. Big chunks of sausage – for once – are not your friend.

3. When there’s no pink left in the sausage, pour in the wine (something dry, preferably, but whatever you’ve got in the house is probably fine) and let it reduce by about half.

4. Add the two cups of your excellent homemade sauce (or the assembly line’s perfectly servicable version), mix it in well, and bring it up to a boil. Reduce the heat again and simmer for 15 minutes. Make sure the vegetables are tender.

5. Cook your pasta while the sauce is simmering, then either finish it in the sauce pan with some of the cooking water or just throw it down on a plate and serve the sauce over it. We’re not picky here. Err on the side of al dente, or you may as well be eating sausage stew with limp pasta.

6. Garnish with those chopped fennel leaves and you’re ready to eat until sweat pants seem like a good idea.

Every July and August, Middle America celebrates the harvesting of sweet corn. There are corn festivals, road side corn stands, and surplus of fresh sweet corn at your farmers market. This is the time to grill corn on the cob.

What most people don’t understand is that outside metropolitan areas the corn being grown in those fields is actually feed corn, used to feed live stock, create whiskey, and turn into high fructose corn syrup. While driving through these fields reminds me of my hometown, I know that I can’t just pull over and pick some ears of corn from a random field and try to eat them. What I’m looking for is the Supersweet corn developed at the University of Illinois in the 1950’s. Supersweet variety is modified to create higher levels of sugars than regular feed corn.

The “sweet corn” you randomly find at your local grocery store isn’t the variety that tastes the best – it’s the variety that has the longest shelf life. Supermarket corn is usually deep yellow and is picked from god knows where, shipped in a box full of ice, and kept in a cooler for weeks. Who wants to eat flavorless corn where hundreds of hands have poked their finger nails into the kernels to see if it’s fresh. Here is a secret, unless noted it’s local, it’s not fresh. On the other hand, Supersweet corn is light yellow to white kernels throughout the cob – it’s not a uniform color but is melt in your mouth tasty.

I find that the road side stands are the best to pick up the fresh corn – this produce is usually picked hours before you buy it. It’s worth the drive to get your food from an honest working person to share their passion with you; you’ll pay for a dozen ears and notice while the farmer is putting the corn in the reused big box store plastic bag that he or she will put 13 ears into it. Better to give extra product than to short change the consumer, something that has been lost in most of today’s business. Of course if you can’t make it out to a road side seller – the farmers market is the next best option.

So corn should be simple enough to grill – just throw it on the grate and heat up right? Well, the answer is no. The way I grill the corn is for it to simmer in butter, salt and pepper using the husks to keep all the juices in. Who needs tin foil when nature gives a better option of keeping flavor in? Of course don’t be afraid to add parmesan, coriander, or any other spices to the corn before you cook it. Put all the flavor enhancers on first, then it’ll cook into the corn and you won’t have to worry about putting extra on after grilling. Soaking the corn is important, just as you soak wood chips or planks – you are preventing the husks to catch on fire. Adding butter also aids in this process because as it melts it’ll soak into the husks, keeping them from drying out. The below recipe is a fail safe method to grilling perfect corn on the cob, hell it can even make supermarket corn taste better.

The Setup

4 ears fresh corn with husk on

4 tablespoons butter (room temperature)

½ teaspoon salt

¼ teaspoon pepper

Butcher string or extra corn husk made into strips

Cooking

1. Soak corn in lightly salted water ½ to 1 hour

2. Set up grill for medium hot direct grilling

3. Mix butter, salt and pepper together

4. Carefully peel corn husk back, do not remove husks but clean silk away.

5. Cut off ¼ inch tip of corn – this will make tying the husks back together easier

6. Smother each corn cob with 1 tablespoon of butter mixture

7. Bring husk back up each ear of corn and secure shut with butcher string. If you don’t have butcher string handy use excess corn husk to tie shut

8. Grill corn on open grill over medium heat, turning about 1/6 of a turn every two to 3 minutes. Once corn is fully rotated place grill top on for another minute.

9. Let cool 5+ minutes before removing husks

(Note: The freshness of your corn determines the cook time which varies from 10-25 minutes.)

By JB Mays

Not all pasta sauces need be giant chunky messes, slopped over innocent pasta with all the subtlety of an ice cream scoop. Here’s a pasta dish light enough for eating outside on a summer day, but hearty enough to be surprisingly filling. If you prefer, you can marinate the shrimp for a half hour beforehand with some juiced and zested limes (3), oranges (2) and a lemon, along with some garlic, olive oil, and salt. Just remember to get it yourself – I’m not throwing it in the ingredients list. If you don’t like shrimp, then replace that with some grilled and sliced chicken. Or it’s fine without a meat component (sacrilege!). Throw gummy bears on it for all I care. It’s some good pasta.

The Setup

8 oz uncooked spaghetti or linguine
1 tablespoon butter
3 tbsp olive oil
1/2 c fresh grated Parmesan cheese (Don’t use the mummy dust in the green can. Please.)
1 lemon, zested and juiced
12 large shrimp, peeled, deveined, and marinated if you feel like it
1 large egg, beaten (or 1/2 c heavy cream for a richer result)
1/2 c chicken broth
Salt and pepper

Cooking

1. Cook the pasta slightly al dente (8-9 min for the dried stuff, much less for fresh). Set it aside and drain the pot.

2. Knock the heat down to medium-low and return the (empty) pot to the burner. Add your butter and oil. When the  butter melts, add the broth and let it heat through.

3. Turn off the burner, add your pasta, egg (or cream) and Parmesan to the pot. Cover it and toss, then add your zest and lemon juice. Season to taste and top with some fresh herbs if you’re feeling high and mighty.

4. Either fish your shrimp out of the marinade, or season them. Give them about a minute on each side on either the grill or in a saute pan. Add them to the pasta, and you’re good to go.

By JB Mays

Occasionally, the mood may strike to eat healthy. Or perhaps you’re entertaining guests who do. Either way, it’s worth having a few dishes in your back pocket that satisfy health needs and don’t taste like boiled cardboard. Try this one out on them. The ancho chiles give it a strong, memorable flavor – you can find dried anchos in the Mexican sections of most (seriously, almost all of them) grocery stores.

The Setup

1 1/4 lb boneless chicken breasts
4 dried ancho chiles
1/2 oz cilantro (about 4-5 sprigs)
1/3 c canned tomato sauce
1/2 tsp ground cumin
4 radishes, sliced very thin
3 green onions, sliced
6 cloves of garlic, unpeeled (seriously, leave the skin on)

1/2 c yellow cornmeal
Salt
Butter*
Cheese* (Whichever kind you’d like, so long as it melts. So probably not Feta.)

*Leave these out if you’re feeling healthy. As for quantity, that’s really up to personal taste.

Cooking

1. Prepare the polenta first, so you can give it time to firm up. Bring 2 1/2 cups of salted water to a full boil. When it’s going well, add your cornmeal gradually. Stir frequently for 10-12 minutes, until it’s fairly smooth. (Add in your cheese and butter about halfway through if you’re going that route).

2. When the polenta is smooth, pour it into a baking sheet or pan sprayed with nonstick. Let it firm up in the fridge while you work on the rest of this.

3. Throw the chicken breasts, 3 sprigs of the cilantro, and 3 cloves of garlic into a large skillet. Poach chicken over medium heat, covered, for 12 min.

4. Take the chicken out and place it on a plate or cutting board to cool. DO NOT THROW AWAY THE CHICKEN WATER.

5. Take off the stems of the chiles and dump out the seeds (it’s a texture thing, you can add hot sauce later if you think you’ll miss them). Put the chiles in a bowl and pour the leftover cooking liquid over them. Cover it with foil and let it sit for 15 minutes while you do other things.

6. Roast the remaining cloves of garlic in a small, dry skillet. Cover the skillet in foil and you won’t have to clean the bastard later. Efficiency! When they’re blackened out all sides, dump them onto your cutting board and let them cool off.

7. If the chicken has cooled enough to handle, shred it. You can use two forks for this, but if you’d rather not have searing pain in your hands, best just to tear it up with your hands. Just wash them right after. And before.

8. Your garlic cloves should be cool by now. Pop them out of the skin into the blender, and add the tomato sauce, cumin, anchos, and hot sauce if you’d like. Liquefy that business.

9. Throw the chicken and newly-blended sauce into a pan and mix them together. Heat it up, cover, and set the heat to low while you finish the polenta.

10. Take the polenta dish out of the fridge. It should be cool and firm by now. Cut it into four squares and heat a pan with either nonstick spray (healthy) or oil (not so much) over medium high heat.

11. When the pan and oil have heated, throw in your polenta slices, going in batches if you don’t have enough room. Cook each side for 3-4 minutes, until it’s slightly crispy and golden brown. Don’t get impatient and turn up the heat – it will burn and smell like crap.

12. Top polenta with the shredded chicken. Add the radish slices, green onions, and any cilantro you’ve got left lying around. It’ll look approximately as fancy as pictured above. Enjoy yourself.

The summer is the time for light refreshing beers usually in the form of
pilseners, witbiers, and kolschs. Among these styles you will also find brews
with fruit adjuncts, giving your old lady a chance to finally appreciate beer.

My Summer Picks:

Half Acre Daisy Cutter –
If you like hoppy beer you’ll find a unique flavor balance in this
ale. Although this beer is not classified as an IPA, its damn near
close to it. Pours a little hazy with orange/straw color with nice
foamy white head. Fairly strong grassy aroma with a dash of funk,
finishes crisp and somewhat dry. The perfect beer for the end of
a hard day.

Bell’s Oberon -
You cannot deny this good ol’ midwest standby. Classified as a
American wheat ale, this beer is a golden orange color with
a fair amount of haze. A little spicy, citrus tones, a light bodied
super smooth, and super easy beer to drink.

Goose Island Fleur –
My friends are sick of me talking about this beer. Ever since I had a
glass of this last year I’ve been anticipating its next release.
What sets this belgian ale apart from the rest is the use of hibiscus
flowers and kombucha tea. Pours an interesting rose color releasing
a berry/fruit aroma which begins slightly and finishes tart. Don’t
let this one sneak up on you, with 7% ABV you’ll be doing shaky face
photos in no time.

-The Beer Ape

Don’t forget to check out the beers our East Coast friends at Beer Nation recommend:

1. Southern Tier Hop Sun
A tribute to the dynamic energy of the summer. Brewed with 2-row pale malt, wheat malt. Hopped with Centennial, dry-hopped with more of the same.

2. Tröegs Sunshine Pils
Crisp and refreshing with just enough hops to make it something special. Spicy noble hops blend nicely with just the right amount of lager taste to create a balanced and refreshing beer.

3. Dogfish Head Festina Peche
A refreshing neo-Berliner Weisse fermented with peaches.

NOW GO OUT AND DRINK!!!

-The Godfather

Here’s what you’ll need (serves 4):

For the marinade:
1/2 C olive oil
1/2 red onion, finely diced
2 tbsp balsamic vinegar
2 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp sage
juice of 1/2 a fresh lemon
2 cloves garlic, minced or finely chopped
1 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper

For the tzatziki sauce:
1/2 English cucumber
1 C Greek yogurt
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 tbsp lemon juice
2 tbsp olive oil
1/2 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp sage
1/2 tsp coriander

4 butterfly pork loin chops, trimmed of all fat and cut into 1″ cubes
4+ whole wheat pitas

Mix all of the marinade ingredients together in an air-tight container and place the pork cubes in the same container. Shake it up to make sure they’re all coated and stick it in the fridge.

For the sauce, chop your cucumber a bit and toss it into the food processor until it looks about grated. Empty that into another air-tight container, add all other ingredients, stir and let it mingle overnight.

Before you’re ready to grill, thread the marinated pork cubes onto skewers (if using wooden skewers, soak in water for at least 30 min). Grill about 12-15 minutes total, or until browned on all sides and cooked through.

You may want to re-season the sauce before serving. Since all of the flavors don’t jive until sitting overnight, it’s hard to tell how it’s going to come out until just before serving.

Serve with pita wedges, diced tomato and feta cheese.

Like most of you, I spend a lot of time on the internet. I’m always looking for new recipes, websites and just about anything else that I think would be good for Man B Que. In between my endless searches I find stories that just HAVE to be spread. You know, those stories that make you laugh or just make you chuckle and mumble, “seriously, what the fuuuuuck?”

The first one that I came across was on gizmodo.com.

So some grocery chain in North Carolina decides to erect a scented billboard. It’s a piece of steak on a fork that billows out the scent of grilled meat. This sounds like heaven, right? Well, apparently not for Adam Frucci, the author of this post. (adam@gizmodo.com) Adam feels that the “meatstink” that the billboard blasts is “gross.” He actually sympathizes for the “poor” clerk working at the neighboring gas station. I guess the gasoline fumes this poor clerk deals with are more pleasant than the scent of grilled meat. After his weak, crybaby remarks he states that if something like this went up in his neighborhood, he would burn it down. This made me chuckle and say, ’seriously, what the fuuuuuck?’ Adam, I highly doubt you would do that, it’s just a hunch I’ve got, little guy.

The other story that had me laughing was more local. Some guy in Elgin, IL is being held on a $45,000 bond for beating some guy up with a grill scraper. Apparently beating someone in the head with a grill scraper in Elgin is considered aggravated battery. At a Man B Que this would be considered mild entertainment. To top it off, the guy that was beat was the cousin of the attacker’s boss. Seriously, what the fuuuuuck? “Can I get a raise? The bail is $20,000 more than what you’re paying me, you cheap asshole.”

Have a great weekend!

-The Godfather

P.S.
I was listening to Mastadon’s, Blood Mountain, as I wrote this.

Today was a great day for realizing one of the many things that slow me down and make me angry… (I just linked this line to the same blog that I am writing and going to link…weird)

1. The Michael McDonald, flirtatious guy in front of me during my check-in at the hotel: Easily spotted by his horrible white hair and matching facial hair, hence, the Michael McDonald reference. I started humming “Ride Like The Wind,” that horrible adult contemporary song by Christopher Cross that Michael McDonald does back-up vocals on. For a moment my mounting anger towards this, fluffy, white-haired asshole, was subsided by the thought of the lyrics to “Ride Like The Wind.” Then I got angry at the damn lyrics because they sound like the plot to 90% of the Miami Vice episodes. Then being the, fair and non-judgmental, person that I am, I decided to try to believe for a second that Christopher Cross wrote those lyrics based on first hand experience. NO WAY! I was about to explode, then I realized I shouldn’t waste my energy on that, there were bigger fish to fry and other things to be angry at. Luckily, I wasn’t at my boiling point with my original source of anger, “The Michael McDonald Flirtatious Guy!” This guy was hitting on the townie girl at the front desk of the CATSKILL, NY, COMFORT INN. (This town has less of a population than most White Castles do at 3am in Chicago) This place is an “hourly rates” sign away from being a murder scene and he is trying to bag the front desk attendant?!?! I just wanted to get in my damn, 70’s carpet furnished, hell-hole. I needed sleep. Lucky for me, this girl wasn’t falling for his line about how she “looked just like the cutie with the time share down the hall from his in the Bahamas.” That’s another thing, why do creeps like this ALWAYS have a place in the Bahamas? I guess Jamaica is so passé. This guy is up to the mid-nineties vacation spots, Jamaica was SO ‘87! So she finally told him that she changed him into a “nicer” room than he had originally been assigned to and he quietly thought to himself, “YES, tomorrow, I ask her to meet me for drinks at the Applebees down the road. My wife won’t find out a thing!”

When I finally went up to check-in I was gonna ask if I could get a free upgrade but then I realized that an upgrade here is like asking for seconds on your canned cranberry sauce in jail; hell, you’re still in a miserable place. So I just got my room key card and walked into that damp (the creepy brown rug made my socks feel like I had just run a couple of marathons in a swamp with moon boots on), horribly lit dungeon they called Room: 214 and went straight to bed.

-The Godfather